The exciting world of grocery shopping

Today, I thought I'd either write about tar and feathering the AIG executives or review the movie Race to Witch Mountain. But I figured my experience at the market this week would be more entertaining.


(As an aside, I thought tarring and feathering the AIG execs was better than killing them as Senator Grassley had suggested. As for Witch Mountian, it was good fun. I recommend it.)


So I'm grocery shopping when a call goes out over the store's intercom for free samples of Starbucks. As any prudent man would do in these tough economic times, I quickly made my way to the Starbucks counter for my free Caramel Frappacino. Walking back to my cart, I noticed a makeshift stand where two young ladies stood promoting newspaper subscriptions. On the stand was a bowl filled with orange raffle tickets trying to win a store gift card.


I walked up and asked if I could fill out a ticket. One of the ladies said, "Yes, just write your name and phone number."


When I finished writing my name, one of the ladies said, "Your name and shoe size," and giggled.


Now being a man, I'll admit my writing hand shook for a moment. I hadn't been asked that question since I was in college. But being a fine upstanding citizen, I continued on with my area code. The lady leaned forward to see what I'd written and a hint of lavendar filled the air. "I said name and shoe size." Her tone was playful, .


I lifted up my pen, stood up, and looked at her. Her black pants and top fit her curvacious body well. Combined with her clear caramel skin, great smile and sleek, long hair, my heart increased its beat. I know I have a wife and kids, but what man couldn't get a little excited about a fine looking woman teasing him.


"That's quite bold," I said.


"I know." Her eyes sparkled.


The genie's warning from Aladding flashed through my mind, when he'd taken the form of a fighter pilot crash landing, Warning! Danger! Danger!


I quickly finished my phone number and dropped the ticket in the bowl. At which point she gave her official pitch, then I returned to my cart with my caramel frappacino and a spring in my step.


And no, I didn't subscribe.